Wednesday, September 1, 2010

6 Years Ago

Six years ago, seems like a lifetime ago, I held his hand and watched him slip away! September 1, 2004 was the hardest day of my life so far, it was the day my dad passed away. My dad was a constant in my life, he didn't live with us because my mom and dad separated when I was 2. I loved my dad and he was an inspiration to me and still is today! He suffered for so long with numerous illnesses and diseases. He had heart attacks, diabetes, lung cancer. It was the cancer that finally took him. He meant so much to me, still does.
I hate that he has missed so much over the last 6 years. I know he would have loved his grand children so much. I look at Joshua and see my dad every once in a while, Joshua actually remembers him. Sarah was just 4 months old when he died, she has no memory of him at all. I do have a couple of pictures of him holding her. I treasure those. I wish Dad had meet Chad and Sam. Sam's middle name is David just like my dad's middle name. Sam has a birthmark on the back of his head, I like to think of it as a Kiss from my dad and grandma. (I know that sounds silly, but it helps ease the pain)
I went to the cemetery today, just being there broke my heart. I sat and cried for a while and Sam played. He came over and gave me a hug. I know Dad would hate that I have been crying about him today and he would want me to get on with my life. I want to make him proud. I love you, Daddy!

(The above picture is of me and my dad ~ 1978)

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